OK, so I had been hearing about this Madame Zaritzka thing on the web. You answer a few questions, you get a prediction of how your birth experience will be. Here is my prediction:
Madame Zaritska's reading
Madame Zaritska, our resident clairvoyant, wants to help you prepare for the arrival of your child. Here she does her best to predict certain aspects of your labor and birth experience.
What she senses for you:
The day you deliver, outside will be cloudy. Your baby will arrive in wee hours of the morning .
After a labor lasting approximately 3 hours, your child, a boy, will be born. Your baby will weigh about 5 pounds, 7 ounces, and will be 19 inches long. This child will have dark brown eyes and a little patch of brown hair.
But there is more. It is perfectly healthy and normal to want to look good, even during these interesting months! I sense you feel a little reluctant. Well, you're not being silly or shallow -- you're taking care of yourself. And I am happy that you are. Here is some fashionable advice for you to peruse at this special time.
Well, not too thrilled with the baby's weight, but I can handle the 3 hours of labor. Guess we'll know in 14 weeks!
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