I just realized that a week ago today, my blood pressure drama truly began. I had so many emotions going through me that day.
Why did I feel so weird? Why didn't I have any energy? Will I ever be a mother to my little boy?
I am so grateful for all of the support of my mother-in-law and mother. They stepped in and allowed me to do what was needed for me to get better. I only hope I can be half the mother to Ian as they were to me.
I am finally starting to feel better. My bp readings have continued to edge towards normal with each passing day. Breastfeeding has been slow-going, but I think Ian and I are finding our way.
I really feel blessed.
Sunday, May 25, 2008
Thursday, May 22, 2008
Heeerrrrreeeee's Ian!
This has definitely been a very long week. The birth experience was nothing like I ever imagined, but I am happy that my son is here - healthy and strong.I was put on bedrest on May 6th because I had finally crossed over to pre-eclampsia. Unfortunately, bedrest did nothing for me. By that Sunday, I was in the emergency room with what I thought was bronchitis - hacking cough, shortness of breath. My bp was extremely high - I think something like 180/90 (hard to remember at this point), so I was sent to L&D. I stayed the night there, and bp went down enough to be out of danger zone, Ian showed no sign of distress, so I was sent home with instructions to do 24-hour urine check and get checked again the next day at my doctor's office.
Next day, my doctor did an internal - I was closed and soft. I was again told to head back to my doctor's office the next day for a NST and bp check. Big surprise - NST was great, bp not so hot. My doctor ordered me to go to the hospital to be seen by the fetal-maternal specialist to determine whether induction would be necessary. So, I went home, threw stuff into a bag (was getting to the whole hospital bag thing, never got there), and off dh and I went. I ended up having to be admitted - evidently there were lots of women that needed to see the specialist that day - so I went to a pre-partum room, got almost no sleep, and waited.
At 7:30am on the 14th, my doctor came in to see me. At first he said he still wanted me to see the specialist before deciding on induction. He then left and came back a few minutes later and told me that he didn't like how my bp was looking, so he'd induce me regardless of the specialist's recommendation. I called my dh, and told him we were having a baby today. So I was wisked back to L&D and set up in a room. At about 9am, I had my ultrasound with the specialist - At that point, Ian head and bone structure were measuring at 36 weeks, but his belly was more like 34 weeks, a sure sign of the effects of pre-e on the baby. Although Ian, looked great, with everything else, he recommended pitocin.So, at around 11am, I was started on magnesium sulfate as a way to help with my bp.
At noon, I was started on pitocin. After about an hour I had an internal - no change. Contractions were starting, Ian was handling them very well. I continued on like this throughout the day. Being on the mag was probably the worst - my body felt like lead, I was given a catheter, I was exhausted but couldn't sleep. I had another internal sometime in the afternoon - still no change. DH went to get dinner, was back in about half an hour. I'm glad one of us was able to take a break for a while. At some point I told him that he was going to have our next child. Just before 8pm, a midwife came in for another internal - absolutely no change. BP was continueing to get higher. My doctor came in a few minutes later and told me it was time to have the baby.
Everything after that happened in a blur. DH was give scrubs, anethesiologist came in to explain the epidural, then it was off to the operating room. The worst part of the c-section was actually getting the epidural. What seemed like seconds after getting on the table, I heard Ian's cry. He was not happy about being yanked out of his cozy home. I could see him in the side room getting cleaned and checked by the nurse. Apgars were 8/9 - I was on cloud 9 when I heard that. Things were starting off positively. I was finally able to meet my son in the recovery room - so tiny (4 lbs, 8.5 oz), but so alert and wiggly. He had to be kept under the warmer in the nursury for the first 2 days, but at least he was strong enough to stay out of NICU. My bp never seemed to really cooperate. We were both discharged on Saturday, Ian with a clean bill of health, me with bp medication.
On Sunday, I was having a hard time breathing, so dh took me back to the hospital. It was determined that I had developed fluid on my lungs, and my bp was continuing to rise. I was admitted to L&D and given IV lasix to reduce the fluid. I was then switched to cardiac care to deal with the bp. I was so distraught by this point - I was scared, I missed Ian horribly (he was at home with my MIL), and I was so tired of being in the hospital. The people in cardiac were fantastic - they told me that Ian was more than welcome to visit. For once, I felt some peace.
I was diagnosed with Post-partum cardiomyopothy. I also found out that I had moderate to severe leakage in my mitral valve. I was finally discharged on Tuesday after they were able to get my bp down. The cardiologist I saw the next day was great, and I finally feel like
I am on my way to getting better. I am happy to say that Ian is growing by leaps and bounds. Although he lost 4 ounces at first, he has since reached his birth weight, and I find out tomorrow how much he's gained since Tuesday. I'm breastfeeding right now, but have to supplement with formula. He's trying so hard, but the little guy gets tired out with bf, so the formula is needed to make sure he's gaining. Other than dh, he is the absolute love of my life, and I am so glad to be feeling stronger so that I can finally take on the role of mommy.
Next day, my doctor did an internal - I was closed and soft. I was again told to head back to my doctor's office the next day for a NST and bp check. Big surprise - NST was great, bp not so hot. My doctor ordered me to go to the hospital to be seen by the fetal-maternal specialist to determine whether induction would be necessary. So, I went home, threw stuff into a bag (was getting to the whole hospital bag thing, never got there), and off dh and I went. I ended up having to be admitted - evidently there were lots of women that needed to see the specialist that day - so I went to a pre-partum room, got almost no sleep, and waited.
At 7:30am on the 14th, my doctor came in to see me. At first he said he still wanted me to see the specialist before deciding on induction. He then left and came back a few minutes later and told me that he didn't like how my bp was looking, so he'd induce me regardless of the specialist's recommendation. I called my dh, and told him we were having a baby today. So I was wisked back to L&D and set up in a room. At about 9am, I had my ultrasound with the specialist - At that point, Ian head and bone structure were measuring at 36 weeks, but his belly was more like 34 weeks, a sure sign of the effects of pre-e on the baby. Although Ian, looked great, with everything else, he recommended pitocin.So, at around 11am, I was started on magnesium sulfate as a way to help with my bp.
At noon, I was started on pitocin. After about an hour I had an internal - no change. Contractions were starting, Ian was handling them very well. I continued on like this throughout the day. Being on the mag was probably the worst - my body felt like lead, I was given a catheter, I was exhausted but couldn't sleep. I had another internal sometime in the afternoon - still no change. DH went to get dinner, was back in about half an hour. I'm glad one of us was able to take a break for a while. At some point I told him that he was going to have our next child. Just before 8pm, a midwife came in for another internal - absolutely no change. BP was continueing to get higher. My doctor came in a few minutes later and told me it was time to have the baby.
Everything after that happened in a blur. DH was give scrubs, anethesiologist came in to explain the epidural, then it was off to the operating room. The worst part of the c-section was actually getting the epidural. What seemed like seconds after getting on the table, I heard Ian's cry. He was not happy about being yanked out of his cozy home. I could see him in the side room getting cleaned and checked by the nurse. Apgars were 8/9 - I was on cloud 9 when I heard that. Things were starting off positively. I was finally able to meet my son in the recovery room - so tiny (4 lbs, 8.5 oz), but so alert and wiggly. He had to be kept under the warmer in the nursury for the first 2 days, but at least he was strong enough to stay out of NICU. My bp never seemed to really cooperate. We were both discharged on Saturday, Ian with a clean bill of health, me with bp medication.
On Sunday, I was having a hard time breathing, so dh took me back to the hospital. It was determined that I had developed fluid on my lungs, and my bp was continuing to rise. I was admitted to L&D and given IV lasix to reduce the fluid. I was then switched to cardiac care to deal with the bp. I was so distraught by this point - I was scared, I missed Ian horribly (he was at home with my MIL), and I was so tired of being in the hospital. The people in cardiac were fantastic - they told me that Ian was more than welcome to visit. For once, I felt some peace.
I was diagnosed with Post-partum cardiomyopothy. I also found out that I had moderate to severe leakage in my mitral valve. I was finally discharged on Tuesday after they were able to get my bp down. The cardiologist I saw the next day was great, and I finally feel like
I am on my way to getting better. I am happy to say that Ian is growing by leaps and bounds. Although he lost 4 ounces at first, he has since reached his birth weight, and I find out tomorrow how much he's gained since Tuesday. I'm breastfeeding right now, but have to supplement with formula. He's trying so hard, but the little guy gets tired out with bf, so the formula is needed to make sure he's gaining. Other than dh, he is the absolute love of my life, and I am so glad to be feeling stronger so that I can finally take on the role of mommy.
Sunday, May 11, 2008
You're not 35 weeks!
Yes, I've heard that quite a few times during my pregnancy. You can't be that far along, you're so small! Believe me, since I have felt this baby kick both in ribs and punch me in the pelvic bone on numerous occasions, even at the same time, I am positive that I am this far along. Can't help it if he has room to stretch out. Heck, he's his father's son - he loves to stretch!
But never did I think I'd hear it from an ER nurse. OK - before everyone gets excited, no, there were no contractions. Quite the opposite, actually. Allergies, unfortunately, have not been my friend the last few days. So, I was not surprised when disgusting cough showed up. I was surprised when it got so tight that it felt like my throat was ripping to shreds. Then, at 2 am, I woke up gasping - not usual for me. So I sat there for a few minutes - Do I wake up Jay? Do I wait and see how I feel in the morning? Do I wake up Jay?
Then the mantra screamed in my head, "If you can't breathe, the baby can't breathe."
That kind of stopped me dead. Up until this point, I think I would have waited it out, but on Tuesday I was thrown a pregnancy curveball. I was put on bedrest. BEDREST. No working, no housecleaning, and at most, short trips to the store. You don't tell that to a girl that has only been at her job for 4 1/2 months, and is getting to the crazy time. You don't tell that to a girl who has finally had the nesting bug hit. My doctor's response, "Too bad. You're done."
So when the cough and lack of air getting to my lungs showed up with no relief from my inhaler, I decided to take the plunge and wake Jay. He was so great, telling me not to worry, it's easier to be safe than sorry. Off to the hospital we went. Albany is so pretty at 2:30am, even with the drunks hanging around the bars on Lark.
We walked right into ER, was taken to a triage room. The tech took my blood pressure - 155/106. I actually laughed at that - shouldn't I be dead or something with a bp like that? Then, a room inside to wait for a doctor. After waiting for about 1/2 an hour and listening to some drunk say he didn't fuckin' need to be there, that everyone was a fag and he was calling his lawyer, a nurse came in to get my info. She read the info from the intake desk, looked at me, and said with reproach, "You're 35 weeks? You can't be." Thanks. Thanks alot. Then come the comments about the swollen legs and high blood pressure. "You may want to mention that to your doctor" Um, yeah, did I not just say that I was put on bedrest the other day?
So, one thing leads to another. Lungs are clear (yay), but bp, is still not good, and suddenly, there is protein in my urine. Fun. Off to L& D I go. In a stretcher. All the nurses and doctors staring at me when I walk in. I said Hi. What else was I supposed to do?
All in all, my experience was very good. My nurse, Michelle, was so sweet. She basically downplayed the protein-in-urine thing (It's not all that uncommon to have blood in your urine at this point, which will show up as protein. Who knew?) and that my bloodwork came back quite normal. She called my Munchkin "gorgeous" when referring to his movements. And then she told me snoring and drooling were completely normal, and would definitely be gone after the baby was here. Too cool.
I was finally able to leave at 8:30 am on Sunday. As nice as everyone one, and as reassuring as hearing my baby's heart beat nice and strong, I couldn't wait to get home. Best of all, there was no pre-eclampsia. So my legs are still fat, and my bp keeps going wonky for no real reason. I can hang on for 32 more days (or more) until Munchkin decides to make an appearance. Whatever he wants. As long as he's OK.
But never did I think I'd hear it from an ER nurse. OK - before everyone gets excited, no, there were no contractions. Quite the opposite, actually. Allergies, unfortunately, have not been my friend the last few days. So, I was not surprised when disgusting cough showed up. I was surprised when it got so tight that it felt like my throat was ripping to shreds. Then, at 2 am, I woke up gasping - not usual for me. So I sat there for a few minutes - Do I wake up Jay? Do I wait and see how I feel in the morning? Do I wake up Jay?
Then the mantra screamed in my head, "If you can't breathe, the baby can't breathe."
That kind of stopped me dead. Up until this point, I think I would have waited it out, but on Tuesday I was thrown a pregnancy curveball. I was put on bedrest. BEDREST. No working, no housecleaning, and at most, short trips to the store. You don't tell that to a girl that has only been at her job for 4 1/2 months, and is getting to the crazy time. You don't tell that to a girl who has finally had the nesting bug hit. My doctor's response, "Too bad. You're done."
So when the cough and lack of air getting to my lungs showed up with no relief from my inhaler, I decided to take the plunge and wake Jay. He was so great, telling me not to worry, it's easier to be safe than sorry. Off to the hospital we went. Albany is so pretty at 2:30am, even with the drunks hanging around the bars on Lark.
We walked right into ER, was taken to a triage room. The tech took my blood pressure - 155/106. I actually laughed at that - shouldn't I be dead or something with a bp like that? Then, a room inside to wait for a doctor. After waiting for about 1/2 an hour and listening to some drunk say he didn't fuckin' need to be there, that everyone was a fag and he was calling his lawyer, a nurse came in to get my info. She read the info from the intake desk, looked at me, and said with reproach, "You're 35 weeks? You can't be." Thanks. Thanks alot. Then come the comments about the swollen legs and high blood pressure. "You may want to mention that to your doctor" Um, yeah, did I not just say that I was put on bedrest the other day?
So, one thing leads to another. Lungs are clear (yay), but bp, is still not good, and suddenly, there is protein in my urine. Fun. Off to L& D I go. In a stretcher. All the nurses and doctors staring at me when I walk in. I said Hi. What else was I supposed to do?
All in all, my experience was very good. My nurse, Michelle, was so sweet. She basically downplayed the protein-in-urine thing (It's not all that uncommon to have blood in your urine at this point, which will show up as protein. Who knew?) and that my bloodwork came back quite normal. She called my Munchkin "gorgeous" when referring to his movements. And then she told me snoring and drooling were completely normal, and would definitely be gone after the baby was here. Too cool.
I was finally able to leave at 8:30 am on Sunday. As nice as everyone one, and as reassuring as hearing my baby's heart beat nice and strong, I couldn't wait to get home. Best of all, there was no pre-eclampsia. So my legs are still fat, and my bp keeps going wonky for no real reason. I can hang on for 32 more days (or more) until Munchkin decides to make an appearance. Whatever he wants. As long as he's OK.
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